The "girlfriend" concept

It's time to put down something which has been going on in my mind for many days... Something more social... Ummm... Something about a concept known as girlfriend. (In case you're not familiar with the term, read what Wikipedia has to say about it!) I am going to talk from the perspective of a non-committed bachelor (non-committed spinsters could replace the term girlfriend with boyfriend; read its "treatment" by Wikipedia).

Before you proceed further, here's a disclaimer: These are purely my own thoughts, and I am not trying to preach or force my thinking on you. I'm not making any personal remarks against anyone (so if you disapprove, please don't take this as a personal offense or insult). Any humor is intentional.

As far as my Bollywood knowledge goes, we have been accustomed to know the basic needs of survival as "roti, kapda aur makaan" (translated from Hindi, this means food, clothing and shelter), but now it seems to have become "roti, kapda, makaan aur girlfriend"... Okay, that was a bad joke, simply put here 'cause I couldn't find anything more humorous ;-)

What may be the motivations for having a girlfriend? I don't have a perfect answer for that (never had a girlfriend, you see; "experienced" people may give a better answer). But I would, nevertheless, like to explore some possibilities.

The first thing that comes to my mind is the emotional needs of loving and being loved. This is generally for noble beings (like me) with self-proclaimed "love-is-a-way-of-life" philosophy . Some people may recollect a modest version: "Love is not the heart of life, it is a part of life". (Because love is such an involved topic, we'll discuss about it some other time.)

For some folks, a girlfriend is someone whom you can confide in, someone who can be your constant companion, in the sad and glad times. This is a milder form of the above need (I could say that, I believe). This stresses more on the friendship part of it than the romantic part... Anyways, I believe there is a thin line between love and friendship, and it is purely up to the individual to decide as to how he or she views it (in other words, romantic love as opposed to Platonic love or friendship).

Then there is always that physical need... I always find that I generally don't have to elaborate on that. People are intelligent and smart enough to know what I'm trying to say. Hope you get this one ;-)

Those, I believe, are some of the valid reasons for having a girlfriend. Before I begin what I'd like to say next, I would like to point out the observations ("The Meaning of Life") made by Linus Torvalds in his autobiography Just for Fun (a review coming soon!). The motivating factors for anything (related to human needs), he argues, are survival, social order and entertainment, in that order (not necessarily). The reason I mention it here should become clear as you read on. Just spend some time to think on this, and then proceed...

In recent times, however, having a girlfriend has become something of a "fashion", or more appropriately, dikhaawa (show-off, translated from Hindi). When you are seen around with a girlfriend, you instantly become a hit in your friend circle. You become more social, your "social status" goes up. A person without a girlfriend tends to be viewed as something of a recluse (or sanyasi, in common language). Having a girlfriend, then, becomes a prestige issue for some, particularly, people who are finicky about their social status...

On the lighter side, though, commonly associated with the "girlfriend" concept is forwarded jokes (a term every IT professional identifies himself or herself with; click here to know the story about why we forward jokes!). I remember reading (and forwarding) several such jokes:

Believe me, I have nothing against the people who live the "love-can-conquer-all" philosophy. I disapprove (and sometimes, resent) people who wish (or want) to have girlfriends "just for timepass", as they call it (I have had discussions with them on this, mind you!).

And of course, people may argue that my frustration (of being single, or rather, non-committed) is driving me to write all this, but I assure you, this is not the case :-)

"Solitude is my choice, not an obligation..."